who gets to conquer?

Then she pulled my pants down and licked what I'd had down there, whatever that was, I didn't know the curiosities. The things we discussed, I was told we chattered enough about it to understand the dangers of strangers being somewhere they shouldn't be.

            But is it my fault or our fault? We were only children. My cousin, three years older than me, did she know what she was doing? Was she shown that by someone unknown, and now I'm the cycle that is supposed to continue the elegance of traumatic bonding within my own family?

            She's disappeared into an unknown, and I don't know what they learned, or who they learned that from. I can't fault them for the acts performed, but parts of me still feel dirty, unclean, and unkempt from them, the family that was supposed to protect me.

            Is that innocence, someone hurting within us, creating lost causes, thoughts for us, only to break or keep silence?

            Now they shout and say they're surrounded by love, maybe that's the truth, the love I was promised long ago in soft waves. But I've dropped heavy tears, the stars disguised as hugs, they've died long ago.

            The heartbreaks and growing heart conditions, none of them are quite close to breaking off parts of you, like fresh wounds, scarring on your insides, preparing you for a new body because the people that created yours were never yours.